
# 花花花 SuperLaserNino 花花花

## Observations

27 May 2015

424 words

Observations:

• I don’t work well when tired.
• I don’t work well when scared.
• Opipramol … is an antidepressant and anxiolytic used in Germany and other European countries.”
• I’ve been taking 100mg of Opipramol (almost) every day for the last ~2 years.
• I’ve been feeling (almost) constantly tired for ~3–4 years.
• I have severe concentration issues.
• Akrasia is not as big a problem as it once was. I can sit down and decide to work. Being able to think / pay attention for extended periods of time seems to be a big issue.
• My psychiatrist told me the Opipramol might be hindering my concentration and decreasing the dose might help me focus.
• I forgot to take my Opipramol a few times in the morning (I take 50mg in the morning and 50mg in the evening) and only noticed this when I was feeling anxious during the afternoon / early evening.
• I tried reducing the dose by taking only one 50mg pill some time around noon but felt anxious throughout the day, so I went back up to two pills.
• About a week ago I started taking splittable 50mg pills, so I received a dose of 25mg in the morning and 25mg in the evening. I didn’t feel more anxious than usual – perhaps even less.
• About half a week later I noticed I had forgotten to take the 25mg in the morning but didn’t feel any unusual anxiety. I decided to try sticking to 25mg per day.
• My anxiety has not increased.
• Yesterday I felt extremely dizzy, like I was about to pass out, in combination with headaches. Headaches are common for me, this kind of dizziness is not.
• Yesterday I also felt unusually awake. I normally start feeling very tired around 1100–1200, but yesterday I didn’t. I took a nap anyway. The headache improved, the dizziness didn’t.
• I didn’t take Opipramol today.
• Today the dizziness and headache are still there, but less so than yesterday.
• I am optimistic that I will be able to live without depending on Opipramol.
• I am optimistic that I will be more productive without taking Opipramol.
• I tend to get super excited about anything that looks like it’s going to improve my situation and thus may have skewed the facts to point to the conclusion that everything is going to be awesome and I will never have any problems anymore, like, by the end of this week, even though I do not find that probable.

I’m curious to see how this develops.